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BOOTY BOOTY BOOTY ROCKIN EVERY WHERE! {BY SAYEH!} 1 Dec 2011

Booty

I Like Big Butts, and I Cannot Lie!

As much as I abhor the song, I can’t deny that Sir Mix-A-Lot was a man way ahead of his time. In 1992, long before J.Lo stepped onto the red carpet in her infamous green Versace dress and wowed the world with her assets, and single handedly ushered in the era of the booty, he was singing its praises. Literally.

And the parade of voluptuous behinds has been marching on ever since. The torch has been passed from Ms. Lopez to Beyonce to Kim Kardashian and most recently to Pippa Middleton. The entire world was captivated by her hiny when she followed her sister down the aisle in her amazing curve-hugging Alexander McQueen dress. Now, let’s be honest, how bummed (pun intended) is Kate that her sister’s BUTT stole the show at her wedding?? Kate wears the classic Grace Kelly gown, marries the prince, but her sister’s tuckus is what people are writing home about? Dayum.

If that’s not a testament to the power of the booty, perhaps the padded underwear spawned by Pippa’s derriere is. That’s right. You can buy and slip on Pippa’s rear for a mere 24 bucks! It really shows what a badonkadonk worshipping culture we’ve become. I can’t say that I’m upset about it. In fact, I couldn't’ be happier. I’ve had a giant butt since I had a butt. Seriously. My baby pictures? Giant butt.

My behind has been a running joke with my girlfriends for years. From dragging me onto the dance floor every time that god-awful song comes on and pointing at my butt whilst rapping the lyrics (now you know why I hate it so much) to nicknaming it a WMD (weapon of mass distraction), my butt has been a source of much conversation and actually some angst for me.

Buying jeans? Forget it. I envy my friends that can just shop for jeans on line. I have to devote a day to trying on stacks and stacks of different styles to find the right denim for my derriere. And form fitting dresses? Forget it. I can make anything slightly tight and demure look like I’m about to dance in the background of a music video just because of my butt! I’ve long considered my booty-blessing more of a curse, despite the fact that it’s become cool and trendy to be maximus in the gluteus.

Until recently.

Since I started lithing, my butt has finally reached it’s full potential! All of the squats and lunges and fold over seat work and the killer butt-work we do on the mat, has taken my god given asset and really shaped into something entirely new. Recently, while changing into pjs in front of my sister, she shrieked and pointed at my butt. And not for the reasons she used to (sheer shock at the size), but because she couldn’t believe how lifted and firm it’s become. She even marched me out to show my mom, at which point they both started copping a feel to confirm what they were seeing (they’re strange people). Still not over it, my sister asked me to drop trow again when our girlfriends came over (I happily obliged, duh.) Because for the first time in a long time, I’m proud of my booty. And I’m not alone. This is a Lithe Booty.

I look around the studio and see behinds every where that would make the tabloids scoff at the apple-bottomed Brit they can’t seem to get enough of. I’ve watched as a close girlfriend, and fellow Lither has gone from constantly lamenting her tiny hiny to standing in front of the mirror in awe at the booty she’s sculpted for herself from the very butt she had written off as lost cause.

I guess some would say that the easier, less sweaty solution would be to pay 24 bucks for a slip on version of someone’s else’s bum, but I say why bother when we each have our own to work with. One, that with a little help from Lithe, can be shaped and lifted into something pretty incredible. Besides, you never have to throw a Lithe booty into the wash when you’re done wearing it. Nor do you have to explain to your significant other why your butt is hanging on the lampshade. The Lithe booty is permanently attached, and won’t wear or tear over time. Viva la Lithe booty!

See you in class!

2010 Image of Lauren Boggi Goldenberg via Nic D'Amico & Philadelphia Magazine & Lither, Sayeh Hormozi in Lithe Wear via Dom

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So. Many. Tears. (of laughter)

Just snorted green smoothie out my nose I'm laughing so hard! This is hilarious!

This was really funny, Sayeh. Fine ode to the backside. I had many years of torture as a kid from my brother and his friends calling me "butt girl"...which resulted in me wearing a lot of long t-shirts (yet I still wore leggings...hmm...thanks 90's fashion). But these days I am proud of my behind and all ladies should be too! And I do really believe that Lithe helps out the rump a great deal. Woo!

I've had the same butt issues!! Shopping for jeans is definitely my least favorite thing to do. I'm at my 5 month mark now, and I've noticed that its slowly getting smaller and more firm. Can't wait to see more results!!

I have a love affair with my lithe butt. My friend used to call my hiney "nic's lower back" (it was flat). Not anymore!

Awesome post! I've always had a "bubble butt" as my husband loves to call it. Lithe has def given it the lift I need at the ripe age of 30! I even got a 'nice yoga butt' comment from someone while I walked home from class one day (needless to say it made my day)!

Sayeh, you are hysterical! Love this post! My booty has also transformed from a pancake butt to a nice firm and rounded work of art! I'm so proud of it... I failed the "pencil test" a year ago (pre-lithe) and just tried the pencil test again last month and was in disbelief that the pencil would not stay between my behind and upper thigh any longer! I passed the "pencil test" at 30! :)

During thanksgiving my future sister-in-law grazed against my bottom by accident and couldn't believe it. She made my future mother-in-law feel too! They both were so impressed! It felt so good that the Lithe butt I worked so hard for was a hit!

Thanks guys! I'm glad you're feelin the Lithe booty (and that others are too!) I certainly am! MT Solis, I snorted thinking of you snorting green smoothie out of your nose! So sorry! Hope it was worth the laugh!

This is hysterical. The great thing about Lithe is there are butt girls and there are pancake girls like me. We work out at the same place and can achieve the same goal, be happier with our butt (among other body parts). I thought my Asian butt was a lost cause, after reading your blog, I am thinking maybe I still have hope.

Sayeh, loved your post! I, too, embraced my boot-tay after Lithe. Being a petite girl with a Sir Mix-A-Lot worthy behind wasn't easy but Lithe truly helped me appreciate my figure.

Soooo great! I can't wait until I can firm up my big behind! I also have the same type of crazy family!!!

Sayeh! It was totally worth the laugh - green smoothie and all!

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