SAYEH'S LIVING LITHE! 18 Jul 2012
When I settled down at my computer to write this week’s blog, I had a classic case of writer’s block. Out of town for a few days, and away from my Lithe routine, I felt uninspired. I emailed my boyfriend in hopes he could help, and he reminded me that I have a few major things happening in life right now that merit a little reflection (he’s a smart guy). Still uncertain, and a little hesitant to talk about it, I went on TMZ hoping to find something funny to kickstart my creative juices. Nothing. (Yes, my creative process is very complex.) Even the Kardashians aren’t up to any antics this week worth reporting. (Although Kris Humphries can’t seem to escape his baby mama drama.) Then I read Lauren’s blog about “bouncing forward” and something clicked. Although I don’t have any children and can’t relate to her specific struggle, I can still identify with the pitfalls of trying to measure up to a size, or weight, or life that I have determined is the ideal somewhere along the way.
For example, I just quit my job. Up and quit. The programs that I so loved and that sent me to faraway places like Afghanistan and Latvia were coming to an end, and I couldn’t escape this voice in the back of my head that was telling me it was time to move on too. Although, an even louder voice was telling me I was a lunatic to consider quitting. Leave my job without another one lined up? Isn’t that breaking one of the major rules of adulthood? Aren’t I supposed to have 6 months worth of my salary saved up first before I make such a rash decision? If Suze Orman ever got a hold of me or my bank statements, she may actually start having seizures. (I have nightmares about being on her show and having her hold up a pair of heels I can’t afford and chastising me in front of a national audience and forcing me to cut my cable.)
But ultimately, all signs in the universe were pointing to taking on the next challenge in life, so I bit the bullet. At first, I was thrilled! Exhilarated by the idea that I had taken control of my life in such a real way. And very shortly afterward, as I’m wont to do, I promptly became horrified. What was I doing? How would I live? How long would it take me to get another job? Would I make the same salary somewhere new? Would I have the opportunity to do the same kind of work? Would I like the new place? Would my life stay the same? The questions have been keeping me up at night. Quite literally. Eyes wide open staring at the ceiling and gripping my sheets.
But Lauren’s blog about bouncing forward made me realize that all of my frantic fears about hoping life would stay the same was really the wrong attitude. That I need to be looking forward, not worrying about a life that was behind me the moment I handed in my letter of resignation. Because that was the point of taking such a big chance right? Revolting against the status quo? Wanting things to be different?
And when I let go of being totally freaked out, I realized that what I hope is awaiting me around the corner actually makes me feel giddy with possibility. And although, it’s still scary, it’s certainly something to look forward to. So thank you Lauren. And Lithe for always encouraging us to feel good about who we are now, while always striving to improve, take on challenges and look forward.
See you in class!
Image of Lither, Sayeh Hormozi wearing Lithe via Dom