SAYEH'S LIVING LITHE! 13 Feb 2013
It’s been a couple of weeks since I’ve been back in the Lithe swing, and other than feeling sore (the good kind of sore) and trying to remember to just leave my gloves in my bag at all times, it’s been great...until Monday. Monday was one of those What-the-Hell-Is-Going-On-I-SUCK-at-Lithe days.
First, some poor trusting souls in the locker room make the mistake of asking me if they need gloves for Freestyle, the class we are all there to take. I tell them that the class has been changed to Wings. When I see the surprised look on their faces, I know something isn’t right. Didn’t they get the email? I got the email. (Turns out, obvi, that it was a totally different email for a totally different class.) Bummed that their class has been switched on them, I watch as they try to decide whether to bring gloves anyway (never a bad idea). I jam mine into my locker with rest of my things that are oozing out of it, and prance off to the studio feeling prepared for Wings--the class that somehow only I know about.
To my surprise and chagrin, when I walk into the room, I see Pom bands hanging from the ceiling. I don’t remember using the Pom bands in Wings, I think to myself still not piecing the puzzle together. I guess I do need my gloves for this new, unfamiliar Wings. I rush back into the locker room to wrench my locker door open, almost spilling the entire contents onto the floor, fish around for my gloves, and get back just in time to squeeze myself between two girls--both of whom I imagine must’ve groaned on the inside for no longer having the luxury of an empty mat between them. Nope, sorry ladies. I have arrived to bash in your ponytail with my foot during See-Saws.
When Tif tells us to reach for our Pom bands and start a sequence from Cinch, I finally realize this class is indeed Freestyle and I am not ready. I have mentally prepared for WINGS. While everyone else is already on their first set of flat-back-reach-throughs, I am still struggling to get situated since one of my Pom bands is significantly longer than the other. The left band pulls easily down to my side, while my right arm struggles to bring the handle down to my rib cage. That’s ok. I persevere. I tell myself I’ll switch the shorter band from right hand to the left periodically during class to even things out.
Now everyone’s doing flat-back-lunges from left to right, and I’m doing them from right to left. Exhaling on the left? Nope. I’m just gonna exhale on the right. I stop and try to get in sync with the girls on either side of me, but they are going in opposite directions, so no matter what I do I’m in someone’s way. Meanwhile, with my uneven bands, I look like a puppet being operated by a totally wasted Geppetto.
When it comes time to switch the short band to my left arm, it gets tangled up in the blue bands. Once I get them extricated from each other and actually make the switch, I’m being pulled so far to the right I’m starting to feel like Glenn Beck (but seriously folks!). I attempt to change the way I’m facing (over and over again) to get a little more balance, but I just end up looking like Taylor Swift’s Grammy-opening performance--stiff and confused.
All the while, there is one lonely mat, in the midst of a gauntlet of women kicking and punching and bow-and-arrowing and jumping jacking. A mat with a set of evenly matched Pom bands just dangling above it...calling me: Sayeh, come jump around on ME...you will look much less silly. I feel like a cartoon character walking through a desert imagining a lush oasis mirage. Things will be better there on that mat...if only...I could get...to it.
I finally suck it up, find an open hole through the flailing sea of arms and legs, and make it to the new mat relatively unscathed. Did my troubles end here you ask? NO. I ended up just being a total discombombulated mess there too (no uneven bands to blame).
Finally, thank the LORD, class came to an end. I left feeling like a Lithe loser. I could imagine someone from class calling a girlfriend and saying, "I saw that girl from the blog in my class today. She doesn't actually know how to Lithe!" Then, I went to actual Wings last night and chatted with a couple of girls that were in Freestyle with me the night before. And before I could apologize to them for how uncoordinated I was, they both started talking about how they felt totally discombobulated too. I mentioned that I was at my worst, and they said they were so engulfed in their own workout world that they didn't even notice me.
It was such a good reminder to me that everybody has off days and at Lithe no one is judging. Everyone is just trying to make it through the 60 minutes themselves. I had a much better class and felt much more optimistic about continuing to get stronger while keeping in mind that although the bad days will still come, they'll also go.
See you in class!